Watching and Waiting

fema sux

Today, we “stood up” the ICS (incident command system) as a result of being in the 5-day cone for Hurricane Ike. I’ve spent two years preparing for a role that was pulled out from under me by nameless personnel, and now I have a new role - one most unclearly defined. I see it as being set up to fail.

I don’t need this. I can happily and merrily (a favorite adverb of mine!) engage in other forms of gainful employment. But I like my job - for the most part. Until all this goofy ICS / aka role play army games crap comes in. I have no tolerance or patience for it. But that’s the FEDs. That’s FEMA That’s the way it is… IT IS WHAT IT IS.

It’s all a part of Government. Government has been very good to me, and my family. Government can continue to be good to me, but perhaps - not in the peninsula of Florida!?

I am venting. I am frustrated, irritated with the whole Fed influence, bureaucratic red tape. And it’s only just begun. I know.

Take me back to simpler, more peaceful times.

Please.

Today was another 12-hour day. No rewards, no atta-girls. Suck it up and switch to emergency mode …and when we “stand down”…? ..get your work done in triple time, at lightning speed. ..as if the storm didn’t exist.

I am bitter. I am frustrated.

But. What difference does it all make?

NONE.

 

Silly Season

I worked hard today. My shoulders and neck ache from a full force day. I got home last night after a Council meeting at about 11:30 PM. Wednesday was a 16 hour day. Today started bright and early at 8:30. I woke to what I determined would be a successful day. My head was swarming with “to do’s” for today, some with imminent deadlines. We’re in what our Finance Director calls “silly season” - budget adoption. Florida law has very strict guidelines on how municipalities adopt their annual budget, the forms, timing, even the advertising, down to the number of days between public hearings, the position and placement of the ads, even the size of the font of the title line. With an aggressive Council and a relatively new, and aggressive Town Manager, the budget calendar was set months ago. To fit into the statutory guidelines, staff had a matter of a few short hours to make the recommended changes in the tentative budget and get it to the paper for print. Initially, that was my top priority: meeting budget ad deadline.

The day was one fraught with interruptions, hiccups, challenges. But I persevered, and despite all the other sideline issues, managed to click “SEND” at 11:57 AM…three minutes under the deadline.

Then came Ike. I used to almost enjoy hurricane season - that was before Katrina. Katrina was reason for the feds to institute their bureaucracy in the form of forms and systems and red tape, known as the Incident Command System. Now, if the Town is within the five day cone, we have to stand up the ICS. Of course forecasters are so skittish, that the entire state of Florida is often within the five day cone. It’s tiring playing army. I am so deep in my normal job duties, I don’t have time for war games.

I got home just after sundown, nearly 8:30 PM. That’s a 12 - hour day. Lunch was Chinese delivery for many of the staff - budget time is, truly, silly season. So is hurricane season.

One moment of levity from one of the Town’s more colorful staff members, Ike may be a real bad-ass - look what he did to Tina Turner.

Aw jeeze…

 

Big Cypress Muck About

Today Theresa and I joined folks on the Muck About in Big Cypress National Preserve.  Following is a series of photos I took.   It's really awesome!  I had a GREAT time!  The water never got over waist high, (my waist, that is - and I"m 5'7"tall) .  Enjoy the photos, and I'll write more later.

                                     

                      

 

 

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A Quiet Sunday

It’s unusually quiet this morning. Being the dead of summer, nearly every window is shut against the heat and humidity. It’s wet. Weeks of rains and high humidity. No children are outside playing. No birds are merrily singing. The drone of each neighbor’s air conditioning unit occasionally is heard. Feeder bands from Gustav stir the trees into a whirl with brief bursts of rain slammed against the windows. Then all is quiet again. My clock flashes 2:37 - reminding me it wants to be reset after the power outage last night. Stormy weather. A distant rumble of thunder, a swirl of the trees and then stillness. The only sound I hear is the click of my keyboard.

Perhaps I shall stay in bed this morning. I enjoy the soft rosy glow of the Indian Peach walls, the salmon colored shears and the golden flicker of the cypress rose scented candles. They add to the pink blush of my crisp cotton bedding. There is a warmth to this room that doesn’t exist outside of these four walls. I feel very safe.

ONE - Self

After I posted my poem, Self, I sent it to my brother.  He replied with a poem of his own, titled "One" (below).  I asked him if I could post it here in my journal, and he said,

       Sure, it belongs to you and you may use it as you wish. You may want to add a disclaimer that makes reference to the fact that the author has spent the past month on cloud nine.....

I liked it, and I hope you do too...

One

The caterpillar does not die
It grows into the butterfly

A person's need is not all greed
It is the spark that makes the growing seed

Living life with caring indulgence
Is a life that celebrates abundance

A person with an open heart
Grows to know she's not apart

Just as dust grew to be the sun
We grow to learn we all are one

KMD

Self...

An overshadowing loss,

A feeling described as blue

A mourning is taking place

What else could I do.

Sacrifice the selfish separate self

Deny indulgences and greed

Put away the denials

Suppress the carnal need.

I close my eyes with anticipation

Searching each evening dream

Looking for guidance - perhaps a clue

For a glimpse into the unseen.

The morning comes; I’m not ready

But life goes on, and so must I

I go through the day reminded

The selfish separate self must die.

Your Selfish Separate Self tho’ tough,

At thought of Death, is terrified,

And can quite frighten you,

When looked straight in the eye.

Reflecting back as carnival mirrors,

The master of deception

The Selfish Separate Self will fight,

To maintain its position.

A conscious conditioning

With each spoken breath

To speak my truth with clarity

Put Selfish Separate Self to death.

Speak one’s Truth with Clarity

Is not easy to learn

When bombarded with negativity

Around each daily turn.

 

-Michelle DeMars Mayher-

 

::Within and Without

Torn Between and Against

Mirrors on ALL sides

Split Inside and Out

Again and again

Thus is the Ignorant SELF::*

*The Children of The Law of One - The Lost Teachings of Atlantis”